“…when Alexander the Great saw the breadth of his domain, he wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer.”
The Knicks’ stud rookie Kristaps Porzingis is pretty accomplished, too! But even he has room to improve, and thus I wrote about three aspects of his game he’s yet to conquer.
In which I recap the Knicks’ best win in a long time, quote Raiders of the Lost Ark and Ghostbusters, and accidentally prove the analogy Danny DeVito:Arnold Schwarzenegger::Carmelo Anthony:Kristaps Porzingis.
Image courtesy of the great Stingy.
Let’s be honest: without rivalries, professional sports is a bunch of genetic freaks running around in pajama-ish clothes while millions of people watch and displace their failed adolescent dreams on them. That’s no fun. But rivalries…ahh, when the blood is angried up, then shit gets real. If you’re gonna displace, after all, why not displace something useful? Like hatred?
In part 1 of a two-part series, I looked at three Knick rivalries: the 70-year conflict with the Boston Celtics, the psychologically torturous bicoastal beef with the L.A. Lakers, and the now-dormant but once-fierce-as-the-fires-of-Mordor battles with the Baltimore Bullets. Please remove all metal objects from your person, take off your footwear, and prepare for a flight back in time, when sports-hate still roamed wild and free.
The Celtics beat the Knicks 96-92 tonight. I recapped for P&T here. This was like watching two teams of fourth-graders going at it. Everybody’s hustling. Everybody sucks.